Thursday, March 11, 2010

new

it's amazing how easily we let people get under our skin. once you let them in they stay, they become a part of you. when you love someone it is all the more scary. they can change you. they do change you.

i tell everyone i am doing what i want. but i don't know what i want. do i want a boyfriend? i am not sure. i like kissing boys. i like having them hold me and make me feel safe and warm. i like the attention. and i like feeling giggly and happy and pretty. but i dont like the obligations. i don't like the feeling of guilt when i blow off my friends because i'd rather lay in bed and watch movies and hold hands and kiss.

this boy hasn't consumed me yet. but maybe i want him to? this boy i know nothing about. the boy who wants to take me bike riding on lakeshore drive after our first date.

this is the year i can finally learn what i want. and make mistakes and take chances.

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